i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
where does the pee come out of this thing
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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