whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
