Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
