I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
