the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
