ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
