just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
i believe in u and ur pee
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
