You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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