that's an acceptable place to lick
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
