we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
