please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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