i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I feel like death gave me a hand job
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
i out mim tonsoeep
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize