so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
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