OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
no you cant smoke seaweed
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
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