I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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