And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
