no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
