Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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