I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Randomize
