I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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