You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Life is so much better after having sex.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
