Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry oh_no_lol hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.

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(443): View more from Maryland

And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes

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(301): View more from Maryland

I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are

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(616): View more from Michigan

sometimes you have to go after what you want

(313): View more from Michigan

true. and i really want to cum

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night

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(904): View more from Florida

the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing

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(530): View more from California

We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."

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(970): View more from Colorado

You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.

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