So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize