man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
