weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
