I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
