just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
