woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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