I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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