your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
