Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize