oh god the rape fog is back!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Randomize
