girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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