its not stalking. its research.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
