grandma shit on top of the toilet
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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