girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
