I met the friendliest cop last night
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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