using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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