Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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