You just made me feel so damn special
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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