So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Randomize
