It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
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