Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
