I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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