Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize