So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
