now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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