I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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