I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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