just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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