Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
