I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
