Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
