i think my mom watched the whole time
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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